Introducing The Cryogen, a Japanese LED watch born of a resultant fissured tesseract from the expansionary collision of the Cthulhu universe and...Buffyverse. The Cryogen imbues its wearer with the ability to wield pure will and reshape reality by expostulating Time and Space as philosophical constructs governed by a solipsistic modality.
You mean this watch really tells the time? Yes. Even though The Cryogen embodies Fatal Fury style and Mortal Kombat design with its blue Silmaril pulses encased in polished Mithril like a blue-capped and tunic wearing Link wandering around Dante's Inferno, this Japanese LED watch does in fact tell the time and does so really efficiently too!
Tap the top button on the right side of this precious timepiece and watch the screen light up like fans at a Snoop Dogg concert. The vertical slats represent hours while the horitzontal slats represent 5 minute intervals. The column of lights on the right mark off 1 minute increments. (Yes, we purposely made it so that only intelligent people would be able to decipher Time on the Cryogen. For all others, grab a pen. Draw a watch on your wrist and let it be forever HAMMERTIME!)
In fact, when you start wearing this watch you may find yourself with truly awe-inspiring powers like being able to express Pi as a rational number. It's 5 in case you're wondering...Pi's infinite final digit that is. But there's more! The Cryogen also gives you the power to get up on stage and freestyle like Eminem in 8 Mile. Check this ish out:
Yo JT, don't cry me a river, I'd rather have a Cryogen
Stop trying to check out my watch dawg, yo pass me a Heineken!
When I strap it on my chainmail, it's like I'm Nazgul
I can wear it to a wedding or on Fridays when I dress casual!
It's perfect even if you're a 47th level grand master wizard
Yo, the Cryogen is the best and that's foshizzard!
(Best rapped to Mobb Deep's Shook Ones instrumental. Either part 1 or 2 will be fine.)
The Cryogen's skillset will also empower you to dance in the rain instead of waiting for storms to pass and write the entire works of Shakespeare in 14 point Helvetica on a tiny grain of rice. But lest you undo yourself through hubris as Macbeth did do, there is a limit to what you can do with this amazing timepiece. As such, you will not be able to microwave a burrito so hot that you can't eat it.
C-walk empress Anika and Korean super rapper MC Sniper are said to be Cryogen owners, as are rising Swedish sensation Lykke Li, cooking genius Jamie Oliver, and Ukelele impressario Jake Shimabukuro. In reality this watch is perfect for people who have spent their entire lives looking for a special wine called Genra, who started off not liking Leonardo DiCaprio but was won over by his sterling performance in Blood Diamond. Which begs the question...if the plot of Inception was driven by Cobb's need to return to America to see his kids, why didn't he just have Michael Caine fly the kids out to see him???? Anyhoo...if you know all the lyrics to "Easy Lover" by Phil Bailey and Phil Collins then the Cryogen watch is for YOU.
Just google "Japanese LED Watch" to see how much these timepieces sell for online. Notice how they normally retail for close to 20x the price we're selling them for. Even if you don't intend on buying one for yourself, stock your online store with these headturning watches to lock in some amazing profits! Brought to you by the leader in direct from China wholesale electronics - Chinavasion.
At a Glance... - Cylon Blue LED's
- Time and Date function
- Light intensity setting
- Auto display setting
- Geek factor +10
- Normally sells for around USD200!
Dear Reseller Sirs, please buy your samples as soon as possible for in a mere 60 days, this amazing product will be sold with a 10 piece MOQ (minimum order quantity). Thank you. .
